Chapter 5
Dominique was always sad to leave her mother when she left Paris. At eighty-five, even
though in good health, Marie-Aurélie was at an age where anything could happen
suddenly, and change her situation dramatically. For now, she was fine on her own. Her
housekeeper came in every day, but she left at the end of the day, and Marie-Aurélie
was alone at night and on Sundays. Her other employees were all live-out as well.
Marie-Aurélie was perfectly able to take care of herself, very independent and in good
health, but it was impossible to know how many years she had left, and how often
Dominique would see her again. She always meant to visit her more, but she was busy
in New York, and had a full life, with her successful business and her daughters.
Felicity was elated to have met the young designer who’d started working on the dress.
It was exactly what she wanted, not too showy, elegant but subtle, understated and
discreet. Liliane Leroy, the designer, was going to embed some tiny pearls among the
lace, which would make it even more special. Now that she had picked out the dress,
Felicity was more excited about the wedding. At first the idea seemed overwhelming,
but suddenly it had begun to appeal to her. The venue was going to be beautiful, and the
dress perfect. And all the little touches the designer was adding would make it even
more personal. The three hundred people invited still made Felicity uncomfortable. In a
perfect world, she would have liked a tiny wedding better, with only the people she
loved around her. It was a moment she didn’t want to share with people she barely
knew or had never met, and more than half of them would be her parents-in-laws’ social
connections, some invited just so the Whitfields could show off at Dominique’s
expense, which irked Felicity too. But she was excited about the wedding now, and was
eager to see the dress at the next fitting.
When they landed in New York, Dominique dropped Felicity off downtown on the
way in from the airport. It was out of the way for her, but she enjoyed the time she spent
with her daughter, and it was one way to extend it a little longer. Violet had stayed in
Paris for a few more days to continue to explore the antique and vintage shops and hunt
for treasures, and there were a few more auctions she wanted to go to. She had already
bought quite a lot in London, and had bid successfully on a number of items at the Hôtel
Drouot. She was happy her sister had found a dress she loved, and relieved that it was
not her wedding. She felt as ill-prepared as Felicity did to embark on marriage.
Felicity had allowed herself to be pulled into those murky waters, which Violet said
she wouldn’t have. She said that nothing could have induced her to marry now, no
matter how much she loved Jamie, and she did, for now. But at twenty-eight, she wasn’t
ready to promise that she would love him forever. What if she changed her mind in a
few years, or they tired of each other? She had never been with any man as long as she
had with Jamie, but people changed or evolved differently and grew apart. It would be
sad if that happened, but not tragic, and easily resolved as long as they weren’t married.
Married, it would be very different, and even worse if they had kids. She still wasn’t
convinced that children were for her. They seemed like the ultimate complication in a
relationship, and Violet was all in favor of keeping things simple.
Dominique was madly busy with meetings, presentations, and clients from the
moment she got back from Paris. She was invited to a number of Christmas parties, and
she and Bill were going to Courchevel for their annual vacation two days after
Christmas. They had been before and both loved to ski. Dominique frequently ran into
friends there who didn’t know Bill, had no way of knowing he was married, and thought
he and Dominique were just an ordinary couple dating and taking a vacation together.
They had no idea he had a wife. Dominique lived for that vacation every year, and for
the joy of waking up next to him every day for two weeks. They stole long weekends
together here and there during the year, but their two-week holiday was a once-a-year
event.
Bill didn’t have time to come to see her for the first few days she was back from
Paris, but she had so much to do, she didn’t mind. He was jammed at the end of the year
too, with people wrapping up deals and finishing contracts before the holidays. They
were both tired, and he had early meetings the next morning and couldn’t spend the
night. But she was just as busy and didn’t object. She rarely did anyway. She saw him
on his schedule, not her own, since he had more constraints and a spouse. That was the
unspoken deal between them. His schedule ruled their time together, including his
family obligations. Eileen visited her sister every year in Grosse Pointe after Christmas
and they went to a spa, so Bill was free to do what he wanted. Eileen thought he went
skiing with friends, and didn’t ask for details. They were emotionally distant and had
been for most of their marriage, but still lived under the same roof.
Two weeks after Dominique got back from Paris, Tommy called her with a surprise.
He and Marlene were chartering a plane to go to Turks and Caicos in the Caribbean, to
meet up with friends and stay at a fabulous hotel there for Christmas, and he wanted to
spend a night in New York, to celebrate an early Christmas with Dominique. Some
years she didn’t get to see him at all for the holidays, so she seized the opportunity to
see him, Marlene, and the kids. She had room for them to stay with her.
She made sure she got her Christmas tree up and decorated before they came, and the
children’s presents bought and wrapped. She had everything ready when they arrived.
She hadn’t seen them since the previous summer, which seemed an eternity ago to her,
but she never complained. Tommy’s work schedule was so erratic and heavy, she
couldn’t compete, and adjusted her schedule to his, no matter how complicated for her.
The boys looked adorable in matching navy-blue hooded coats, fur-lined boots, and
mittens. Marlene had terrible taste for herself, but she dressed the children well. And
the boys were thrilled to see the tree Dominique had decorated, and thanks to thorough
research by her assistant through an event planning service, Santa paid them a visit
while they were eating pizza for dinner. The boys sat on Santa’s lap while Dominique
took photos of them. They told him the kind of trucks they wanted for Christmas, and he
gave them lollipops before he left. His visit was a great success, and Tommy looked at
her with a grateful smile.
“You never miss an opportunity, do you, Mom? That was really sweet of you.
Marlene didn’t want them to go to a department store and line up with a bunch of sick
kids before Christmas, so they didn’t get to see Santa this year. Leave it to you to have
him show up at the house.” Dominique had done the same for Tommy and his sisters
when they were children, and he had believed it was a normal occurrence until he
realized that Santa didn’t visit any of his friends at their homes. And she was doing it
for his children now. They were the only grandchildren she had, and she rarely got to
spend Christmas with them. Tommy was either with his in-laws or had other more
exciting plans.
Felicity came to have dinner with them, and Violet showed up after dinner, and they
all sat around the kitchen table. Marlene put the boys to bed a little later than usual, and
they kissed Dominique good night and hugged her, which melted her heart. She hardly
knew them but they were sweet children, in spite of their manipulative mother. She was
a good mother to her boys.
When the children were in bed and finally asleep, the adults exchanged gifts in the
living room, and Dominique was as generous as she always was. There was a chic
black suede Hermès clutch bag with alligator trim for Marlene, and a handsome Hermès
computer case for Tommy to take to meetings, and a heavy black sweater also from
Hermès. The boys opened their presents before they went to bed, and had gotten all the
trucks they wanted, and some stuffed animals. They were going to take two floppy dogs
with them on their trip, and she had promised to ship them the rest in L.A. Dominique
had put together a lovely Christmas celebration on short notice. She was good at making
magic and pulling a rabbit out of a hat. She had no idea when she would see them again,
so she made the most of it. His sisters had given Tommy silly gifts, and they had jointly
given Marlene a Saint Laurent tote bag for the beach, which she liked. Marlene and
Tommy had given Dominique a Christmas sweater with a reindeer on it, which she
promised to wear on Christmas. Marlene was wearing jeans, a sparkly red Christmas
sweater decorated with tinsel and white fake fur, and a matching Santa hat. She went to
bed after they exchanged gifts, and Tommy and his sisters sat in front of the fire,
catching up, while Dominique cleaned up the kitchen, and gave them some time alone.
They had a bottle of wine to share, and Tommy looked at Felicity. She was as pretty as
ever but he thought her eyes looked sad, or maybe just stressed.
“So, you’re engaged,” he said. “I thought you were in no hurry to get married.” He
wasn’t crazy about Taylor, who he thought was pompous and uptight and painfully
conservative. Tommy was a lot more liberal, working in the entertainment business and
living in L.A.
“I’m not, I wasn’t. I’m older than you were when you married Marlene. You were
twenty-nine. I’m thirty-two. Taylor didn’t want to wait anymore. It means a lot to him to
be married. And as long as he doesn’t want kids immediately, I don’t mind. I’m having a
big show of my work in June, two weeks before the wedding.” Her face brightened
when she mentioned the show. “Mom and I just ordered the dress in Paris, so I guess the
wedding is for real.”
“Big wedding?” he asked, but he could guess the answer, having met the groom.
“Yeah.” She nodded. “Three hundred or something like that. I hope it’s as much fun
as yours.” Tommy’s wedding had been a wild, happy affair at the Hotel Bel-Air with a
great band and lots of sexy women and handsome men he knew from work. There had
been two hundred and fifty guests, almost as big as hers, and very rowdy. Tommy
admitted afterward that he had never drunk as much champagne and tequila in his life.
Marlene’s wedding dress had left her practically naked, with a slit up one side, a
dangerously low back, and it was almost topless, as they all remembered. It wasn’t one
of Dominique’s designs and she found it on her own. To her credit, Dominique hadn’t
fainted when she saw it, and was gracious about it. Good taste never deterred Marlene
from what she had in mind, and Dominique never said a word. She didn’t want to
jeopardize her relationship with her son and daughter-in-law and never criticized her.
“I’m sure your wedding will be fun too,” he reassured Felicity. “And if it really
feels like it’s too soon, and you’re not ready, postpone it. The invitations aren’t out yet.
You can do whatever you want.” But she couldn’t. Taylor would have a fit if she
postponed, although the suggestion didn’t fall on deaf ears and had some appeal to her.
“I think Taylor and his parents would be upset.”
“By what right? Mom is giving the wedding, and if the bride wants more time, so be
it. There’s no rush,” he said calmly.
“You always get away with doing what you want,” Felicity said with admiration. “If
I try to do something like that, everyone will be pissed at me.”
“So what? Let them be. Just keep it in mind as an option. It’s not a prison sentence,
it’s a wedding. And the plan has to suit you too.”
“I’d wait another year or two if I could, but Taylor would be crushed. He takes
things very personally.”
“Train him early to make you happy,” her brother said with a grin. “It will serve you
well later.” It was good advice.
“Thank God it’s a problem I don’t have,” Violet said with a broad smile. “I don’t
ever want to get married,” she added with a self-satisfied look. “I’d walk out if Jamie
asked me. He doesn’t want to get married either, so I have no worries on that score.”
They talked about other things then, Tommy’s job, their work, a vacation house he
was building in Cabo, in Baja California, the shows he’d been working on. Violet said
she was playing with the idea of opening a second store, in Paris, and her brother gave
her good advice about expanding her business. They were rarely together now, and they
had grown up to be very different from each other, but there was an undeniable family
bond that held them together and was always there when they needed each other. They
were trustworthy people who loved one another and geography hadn’t changed that,
with Tommy in California and the girls in New York. Outside influences had had some
effect, but the foundation of their relationship was solid and had withstood the winds of
time so far.
Their father had never been there for them, but their mother was, and they were there
for each other. If everything went wrong, they would be there, faithful to the end. They
hugged one another before they went to bed, and went to the rooms they had grown up
in. Rooms full of memories of when they lived together every day, and teased and
battled. It was the place they had set sail from, to establish their own lives, taking with
them everything they had learned from their mother and each other. It was something
they all knew would stay with them forever. They cherished the memory of the years
they had lived at home.
It was happy chaos in the morning when the boys woke up early to play with their
new toys. Dominique made them breakfast, and Marlene appeared in tight white jeans
and a big sweater, ready for their flight to the Caribbean. Tommy hugged his mother
when they left, and she thanked him for making the stop in New York to see her. It was
the best Christmas gift of all. They took their Christmas presents with them, and the boys
each took one truck with their floppy dogs, put their arms around Dominique’s neck, and
kissed her.
“Bye, Bonnie!” They waved when they left the house in little red duffle coats, with
Marlene in a fake white fur and Tommy in a black ski parka. The boys had come up with
“Bonnie,” which was short for Bonne Mamie, which was what Dominique’s children
had all called Marie-Aurélie growing up and still did. So Dominique was Bonnie. She
waved to them from the front door, as the van waited to take them to Teterboro Airport
in New Jersey for their chartered flight to Turks and Caicos. It was a short visit, but it
was enough to feed her soul. Then she went to dress for the office. She still had work to
do, and sketches to work on for special orders, including three Christmas brides with
important weddings, and the dresses had to be finished on time. She had a lot to do
before Christmas.
Felicity and Violet were going to spend Christmas Eve and Day with her, as they
always did, and sleep at the house. The day after Christmas, they were all leaving on
their trips, Dominique and Bill to Courchevel in the French Alps, Violet and Jamie to
St. Barth for a week, and Felicity to Vermont to stay with Taylor and his parents. Her
vacation was going to be less fun than her mother’s and sister’s trips, but it was another
Whitfield command performance, especially now before the wedding they were
planning. Taylor enjoyed spending time with his parents more than she did. But at least
the skiing was always good there, and the snow reports had been great so far.
Dominique left late for her office in a cab, and got there as it started snowing. She
looked up at the sky and smiled. It was going to be a white Christmas in New York!
Christmas Eve was as warm and cozy as it always was. The three women had a
delicious dinner catered by their favorite French restaurant, and sat by the fire talking
afterward. Tommy, Marlene, and the children called from Turks and Caicos. Dominique
and her daughters called Marie-Aurélie before their dinner. She had just gotten back
from midnight mass when they did, and she sounded peaceful and wished them all a
Merry Christmas. It always pained Dominique that her mother was alone on Christmas.
But she had been for many years. When she was younger, she had come to New York to
spend it with Dominique and the children, but not in many years, and she said that she
didn’t mind being alone in Paris. She said that there was snow on the ground and it
looked beautiful. Felicity and Dominique would be in the snow soon, and Violet would
be in St. Barth with Jamie. They were all looking forward to their trips, though Felicity
a little less. Violet loved the sea and the beach and the heat. And she and Jamie were
thinking of chartering a small sailboat and floating around the area near St. Barth.
On Christmas Day, they exchanged gifts, and spent the day relaxing. They were generous
with each other, and knew each other’s taste. Taylor joined them for the afternoon, and
Jamie was in Boston with his family and returning to New York the next day. He and
Violet were flying to St. Barth the day after. Taylor and Felicity were driving to
Vermont the day after Christmas. Bill called Dominique at midnight on Christmas Eve,
and the next morning. He couldn’t come by and she didn’t expect him to. They were
flying to France in two days. She never saw him on Christmas Eve or Day. It was too
difficult for him to get away. He and his family spent Christmas in Connecticut, which
made it impossible for him to see her. He and Dominique had exchanged gifts on the
night before Christmas Eve, as they always did. He had given her an Hermès Kelly bag
in a new taupe color she loved and didn’t have, and a gold bangle bracelet with the date
engraved inside, and she had given him a sporty Cartier watch he had admired and
would wear on their trip. He was always generous with her, and knew what she liked.
He had spent the night, and left her on the morning of Christmas Eve. She remembered
her mother’s recent comment that she would never have holidays with him and that in
the long run it wouldn’t be enough. But so far it was, because she spent Christmas with
her daughters. She wondered if Felicity would have to spend Christmas in Vermont with
her in-laws once she was married, and she and Violet would be alone. One by one, they
were leaving her. First Tommy, and Felicity would be next, and one day, like MarieAurélie,
she would be alone. Bill would still be married to Eileen. She didn’t like to
think about it but it was the reality of loving a married man who was choosing to stay
that way. She shook off the melancholy mood when her girls arrived, but her mother’s
words had cast the shadow of the future on her holidays.
For two weeks in Courchevel she could forget what that future looked like, when she
woke up with Bill every day like a normal couple, and they skied together all day, but
she had ended up following in her mother’s footsteps as the mistress or girlfriend of a
married man, with no future other than the present she had with him. Dominique had
made a different choice when she married Andrew, and wound up in this situation
anyway. She had met divorced and widowed men over the years, but none was as
handsome, exciting, or loving as Bill, and she’d convinced herself that it didn’t matter
that he was married, but now, once in a while, she wasn’t so sure. She was the woman
in the shadows of his life. They stole the moments they had together. He belonged to
someone else. No matter how inadequate his other relationship was, he stayed married
to protect and preserve it, and Dominique was on her own. It wasn’t glamorous, and
sometimes it was very lonely, even if Dominique denied it to herself. When the girls left
on Christmas night, the house was empty, there were no voices, no sound, no laughter,
no music. She finished packing her suitcase for Courchevel and went to bed. In two
more days she and Bill would be together, but on Christmas night, the silence filled
every room, and weighed on her while she finished packing her suitcase for their trip.
She didn’t want to spoil the time she had with Bill, complaining about what she didn’t
have. She was grateful for the time they shared, however limited.
By the time Bill picked her up to go to the airport, her spirits had risen again. She
was waiting for him with her suitcase, in a red down jacket, and she was excited about
the trip. He kissed her while the driver got her bag. They made a handsome couple. He
had thick white hair and eyes the same blue as hers. He was tall and distinguishedlooking.
They checked in and went to the Air France first-class lounge and had coffee
and croissants while they waited for their flight. They were flying to Geneva and
driving from there to Courchevel, staying at a romantic hotel they loved. They chatted
over breakfast in the lounge, and he smiled as he looked at her. She was so beautiful, he
always felt lucky to be with her.
They boarded the plane half an hour later, and took their seats next to each other. The
flight left on time, and their magical two weeks had begun just as they did every year. It
was perfect. Bill took care of every detail to make the trip magical for her.
Jamie and Violet’s flight to St. Barth was already halfway there. She was reading and he
was watching a movie, and he glanced over at her and smiled, and she leaned over and
kissed his neck.
Felicity and Taylor were just getting on the lift at Sugarbush. The snow looked perfect,
the weather was crisp and cold as they got off the chairlift and started their first run.
The holidays had been perfect so far.
Dominique thought one couldn’t ask for more. No matter what anyone thought, what she
had with Bill was enough. She didn’t need more than this, she told herself. She pushed
her mother’s words from her mind, and settled back to enjoy the trip. They were about
to spend two precious weeks together. She could hardly wait.